Insults and Putdowns for everyday use

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Insults and Putdowns for everyday use,

а также по поводу

Body, Boobs, Bored, Bums, Cold, Confused, Tobacco

 

Insults and Putdowns for everyday use

 

A sharp tongue does not mean you have a keen mind

Are you always this stupid or are you making a special effort today

Brains aren't everything. In fact in your case they're nothing

Don't let you mind wander - it's far too small to be let out on its own

He always finds himself lost in thought - it's an unfamiliar territory

He doesn't know the meaning of the word "fear" - but then again he doesn't know the meaning of most words

I don't know what makes you so dumb but it really works

I don't think you are a fool, but what's my opinion compared to that of thousands of others


 

Body

I've seen better looking bodies at a car breakers yard

He's built like a brick shithouse


Boobs

She's got tits like a spaniel's ears

She could shade two midgets at high noon

Her boobs are like a photo finish in a Zeppelin race


Bored

I'm as bored as a pacifist's pistol

This party is as flat as a witch's tit

I've seen more life in a tramps vest


Bums

Her arse wobbles like two boys fighting under a blanket

You could park a bike on that bum


Cold

It was so cold that we bumped into a brass monkey looking for a welder

It's colder than an Eskimo's chuff

As cold as a witches tit

It's colder than a penguin's bollocks

It's colder than a grave diggers bum

It was so cold the one armed bandit had a glove on


Confused

As baffled as Adam on Mother's Day

As confused as a blind lesbian in a fish market

As confused as a fart in a perfume factor


 Tobacco

Smoking is a dying art

Smokers, male and female, inject and excuse idleness every time they light up
Earthly Paradise

Tobacco surely was designed
To poison, and destroy mankind
Philip Freneau

I have smoked "carefully blended" mixtures that tasted like a hayrick on fire
JB Priestley

Nicotine is an awful curse
It strains the heart and drains the purse
KT Sarma


I. How to be Insulting Abroad

 

II. Insulting Humour and Quick putdowns

 

IV.  Political Insults & Putdowns

   1. Quotes and Insulting Quotations from Sir Winston Churchill

   2. Quotes and Insulting Quotations from Margaret Thatcher


Сopyright©Ястребов В.И.  avdeevkavlad@rambler.ru 23.01.11г.

 


 

 

 

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